It's been more than 2 months! Wow. I feel amazing.
Today has been a fairly great day. I moved in with my sister for the short time being. For once, I'm going to enjoy just hanging out with friends and not having to deal with much. But... just for a little while.
My sister took me out to an EARLY breakfast this morning (4am...wow) and I had gone to a movie earlier and had popcorn, so I ate bad for breakfast. My appetite wasn't that big though, so I didn't eat much. I keep forgetting that I have shrunk my stomach down, and I'm SO used to big proportions. Another thing, that I'm sure MANY people can relate to, is that it FEELS WEIRD to not eat everything or at least a majority of what's on your plate. It almost doesn't feel right. You're looking at it, and it LOOKS tasty... but you just don't have any more hunger for it.
STOP! lol
I had to learn that, and it's hard because it's SO ingrained in us to "finish" our food. But, what good does that do?
One thing that sucks, is I haven't worked out in another few days...
Not really my fault, this week was kind of me getting my crap together and out of the house, but I wish I could've hit the gym. Not to mention now I'm in another city AND I don't have a gym. :(
But guess what? I look at this as the best challenge I could get. I wanted to become a runner, and what do they do? Go outside and RUN. lol.
It's free, and I don't need a gym. Just a warm hoodie because I live in the frozen north! But, I'm going to go for a run today!
Nothing much else. Love ya'll.

I know my posts lately have been rather scattered, and I apologize. It's simply that lately I have SO much going on. I haven't even been able to hit the gym as frequently as I'd of liked. (I should go to today though, no matter what because I don't want that awkwardness between me and you know who)
So, he gets here today. (in just 3 hours actually). I'm really bummed cuz I couldn't really sleep, I'm so nervous. What do I have to be nervous about... you may ask? I haven't seen him since all of this began. So, the last time that I saw him we were in a happy place and things were fine. It's strange to go from happy to sad with a person and do it all without seeing them face-to-face.
But, I'll be fine.
I'm strong and I do SO much in my life, that this is just....another thing I have to do, i guess.
I've gotten some sweet words of encouragement from a couple people lately and I just wanted to say how much I appreciate it. Right now, getting in shape is the one thing holding my brain together. It's the one thing that is remaining constant. I'll be moving in a day here and my life is all jumbled, but there is one thing I know that it's going to stay the same.
You know, they always say that "anorexia" is all about control. When you've lost control over other parts of your life, you can sometimes become anorexic because it's the one thing that you can 100% control. Now, by no means am I anorexic, I like food WAY too much, BUT: I see how that works. I'm addicted to eating healthy right now. Addicted. I feel like I'm in 'control' of my eating and exercising and not much else.
It's hard for me to forsee in the future when I won't be. When I go somewhere and get bad food, I don't enjoy it. (at my going away party I got spinach queso and just picked at it). It doesn't feel right. Yes, I know that's a good thing, but it's also very strange. I USED to be the girl that would order pizza on my way home and hit the grocery store to buy some snacks to eat WHILE I waited for the pizza. lol. Hmmmm... that was pretty bad. I used to leave work in the mornings and get 2 breakfast meals at Mcdonalds.
That's not me anymore though.
If I have to choose out-of-shape and eating french fries or in-shape and eating grapes... that's an easy decision for me now. I wish I could've hit this mindset much earlier in my life. Although I'm still considered pretty young... it would have made certain things in my life easier.
Ug. Okay, I'm getting semi-depressing. Those who know me, know I HATE THAT!
I like being happy and cheerful and looking at the positive in EVERYTHING.
Although I started this post nervous at the prospect of seeing *someone* in a couple hours, I am now OK.
Why should I allow him to get my feelings all out of sorts?

Okay, thank you for being with me through my 8 weeks of going crazy. My next goal is to get in the 130s by New Years Day. That's only 3 lbs away, so I'm MORE than SURE that's going to happen!
I love you all, thank you for strength.

Weight: 142 lbs

Weight Loss in last 8 weeks: 31 lbs

Weight to lose by New Years (2 weeks): 3 lbs. (piece of cake!)

Sorry it's been so long since I've written! I had my going away party... then the day after that I was stuck in town getting my car fixed. THEN, the next day I was packing and then it's today. I'm still packing and stuff like that today... but I thought I'd do a quick post and put up some pics from my party!
I have officially lost 30lbs since the s2bx has been gone, and he gets back on Monday. hmmm... that'll be weird. But, oh well.

I worked out really good last night. One thing that sucks about losing weight? When I run now, it's only 8 calories a minute that I'm burning. It used to be more than 10. That's good, and bad at the same time. I burn less calories doing something for 10 minutes than I used to. (I know I'm also in better shape, and all that, it's just funny when you work out for an hour and expect a certain number of calories and you didn't hit it.)
Oh well. I'm happy with how things are progressing.
One thing that's really exciting is that I'm getting really close to the 130s. I was there about 2 and 1/2 years ago for a WHOLE MONTH. lol. Before that, would have been high school. Even better? My goal is beyond the 130s, and into the 120s. It seems so close!
I would love to be at 125-126 by March 1st. I think 2 and 1/2 months to lose less than 20 lbs is more than doable, but it's SO WEIRD to think I could be that small! Exciting though. Okay, enough of my rambling. Have a great weekend all! Love ya'll!

Weight: 143 lbs

Weight Loss since Oct. 20th: 30 lbs

New Years Goal: I already hit 146, so I guess we're going for 139. 2 weeks for 4 lbs. That seems more than realistic. Then I can start the new year in the 130s!!! That'd be awesome!

(pics are from my party day! first we had girlie time with nails and hair, then we went out)

I KNOW, I know. I have a few days of ZERO writing in there. BUT, I worked 43 hours over the weekend, and then yesterday went out shopping with a friend. SO, I was kind of busy. When I did get home, I basically just crashed and went to bed. Been SOOOO tired lately. That's okay though.
Today has been a WONDERFUL day so far. It's not even noon, but I stepped on the scale this morning, and I've already hit/surpassed my New Years Goal!!! That was exciting. Seriously, those who want to lose weight fast and do Atkins for it. (used to be me for like a week here or a week there) TRY all natural. You drop the weight, but you don't feel full of grease ( like I did on Atkins anyway.) I don't know. Just my opinion.
Anyway, it's SO crazy neat to be within 20 lbs of my goal! What's super crazy is being at a weight where I fit all my "smaller" clothes, and then I realize that when I hit my goal, I'll need new ones because I don't have any that small! I'm hoping to hit my goal in Feb. or March. It's only 20lbs. (that's a lot to some people, I know, but I just lost 81, so the last 20 doesn't seem so impossible.)
Tomorrow, I'll try to write, but I can't promise anything. It's going to be a BIG day for me. Almost like the coolest birthday I never had. I'm having my big going away/moving party. My sister, best friends, and work people will be there. I can't imagine anything better! My best friend and I are going to start the day doing "girlie" things like manicures/pedicures, getting our hair done, then we were going to get tattoos together. (not matching, just getting them at the same time.) But now I can't for a separate reason, but I'll still watch hers. Then for my party we are all going to dinner and then OUT. AFTER that I'm getting some hotel rooms for after party/crashing. Hopefully it'll be a good time. Okay, well, I'm gonna let ya'll go. I'll hit the gym later tonight. Right now, I'm trying to pack before I lose interest and do something else! And, I need to get that crap done!
okay, have a great day everyone! John, I'll write you at traineo tonight! gotta lot to say.

Weight: 145 lbs ( i know my weigh-ins tomorrow, BUT I'm sure it'll be the same, plus I'll be indulging tomorrow so even if it's another pound down, it'll come right back! lol)

Weight loss since Oct. 20: 28 lbs

Hi Everyone!! Today I had a great day!! I won't go into detail until tomorrow when more things are set into place, but I think I might FINALLY know where I'm going to live and all that fun stuff! Wow, how great it will feel to not be stressed all the time!
Anyway, not much happened today. I work this entire weekend, so don't be too shocked if I don't get very much writing in. I'll try to do what I can though.
One thing that's funny? I don't know how to pack for when I leave. You know how you have that "suitcase of clothes"? Well, I am continuing to lose weight on a pretty constant level, so what I pack today probably won't fit me anymore in a month! That's got it's good and bad sides! It's okay though. Something came up today that might have me coming into a little bit of money, and if so, maybe I'll just get new clothes then! Who knows?
Okay, well, I know this wasn't interesting, but I'm tired and I need to hit the sack. Love ya'll and keep on keeping on.

Weight on Wed. Dec. 6: 149 lbs (weigh in next Wed)

Weight Loss since Oct. 20: 24 lbs (I would love to lose 6 more for a 30 lbs loss by Dec. 20, for a total of two months. that'd be really nice!)